


Breakfast Alone

by OakLeaf444



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Crying, Food mentions, Forgetting to eat, General Angst, Hurt No Comfort, Mentions of Nightmares, Morality | Patton Sanders Angst, Morality | Patton Sanders-centric, Patton Angst, emotional angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-28
Updated: 2019-08-28
Packaged: 2020-09-28 11:46:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,377
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20425451
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OakLeaf444/pseuds/OakLeaf444
Summary: Logan, Roman, and Virgil are all having a bad day. And Patton is doing his best to help them out. But none of them realise that Patton is having a bad day too, and there is no-one left to help him.





	Breakfast Alone

That morning, no-one came down to breakfast with him. He had made pancakes and waffles and toast with crofters: everyone's favourites. but no-one came.

Patton was used to people not showing up for breakfast every now and then, but never all at once. Virgil must be having a bit of an off day, since accepting anxiety, he had made an effort to come down to breakfast as often as he could.

And when Patton clocked out last night, at about 10:30, Logan was still hard at work. Maybe he was too tired to come down, or he had slept through his alarm. That makes sense.

And Roman, well, he had seemed a little off last night - they all had to be honest - so he was probably just brooding in his room. Showing that he wasn't doing too well today, before he would burst in later, asking for hugs and affection.

Patton sighed and carefully loaded up plates of breakfast to take up to them. They may not want to come down to breakfast, but he didn't want it to go to waste before he knew if they wanted it.

He walked up to Logan's door, listening for movement. Nothing. He knocked gently, before slowly opening the door.

He did not expect to see Logan slumped on the desk, fast asleep, his eyes red and puffy from crying. 

Patton let out a small whimper. He had never seen any signs of Logan crying before. What was wrong? Why hadn't Logan trusted him enough to confide in him?

He put the plates down, and went to help his friend. He carefully cradled Logan in his arms, before gently lifting him onto his unkept bed. Logan snuggled into Patton's arms, and Patton smiled.

He stayed there for a while, before remembering the others. He tidied up Logan's desk slightly, making room for the plate of breakfast for when logic awoke.

Next he went to check on Virgil. As he walked towards the anxious sides room, he could feel its tendrils of fear already begin to affect him.

"Its okay, kiddo." He said to himself. "Virgil has taken away the cobwebs and spiders, and he needs your help."

He cautiously knocked on Virgil's door, and after a pause, heard footsteps shuffle to the door. There was a click and the door unlocked.

"Is everything okay kiddo?" Patton looked up at him. "I made you breakfast!"

"Thank you, Pat." Virgil took the plate and walked towards his bed, sitting down and gesturing for Patton to do the same.

He looked tired, and slightly shaken.

"You're looking pretty rough, kiddo, did you sleep okay?"

"Well I fell asleep alright I guess. A little after midnight. But then I had a nightmare and couldn't get to sleep again and-" Patton put his arm around the anxious side, feeling the tension in his shoulders. "and- it is always the same- I never manage to save you all, never good enough to protect you from harm." He looked down, dejected.

"It's okay Virgil. You are good enough. Good enough for me. It was just a dream, and the fact that you dreamt of not being able to protect us shows that you must really care about keeping us safe, and that's a good thing! If you haven't slept too well then why don't you try and get a bit more sleep now? I don't want you to be exhausted all day. And maybe a little nap will help you feel better."

Virgil leaned in for a hug.

"Thanks Pat. I don't know what I would do without you."

"If you can't sleep then don't stress about it. I'll see you in a while kiddo."

Patton smiled and made his way out of the room, and saw Virgil biting into one of his waffles as he closed the door.

Now for Roman. The fact that he hadn't showed at all showed that now probably wasn't the best time for him, but it was worth a try. And breakfast is the most important meal of the day after all.

"Ro?" Patton called through the door. There was a pause

"What?" Roman snapped back.

"Just brought you breakfast, kiddo!" This time he was met with silence. "I'll just leave it out here. I made you pancakes! ... Well I hope you're doing better soon." Patton placed the plate down on the floor, and just as he was about to leave he heard a sigh from inside.

"I'm sorry Pat. I'm just not feeling my perfect princely self today."

"It's okay Ro, I understand. I'll leave you alone for a bit, okay? Maybe try to distract yourself with a movie? I can lend you my The Little Mermaid DVD if you want?" Patton tried to make his voice seem as positive as possible.

"Thanks, Padre." 

Patton saw the door open a crack, catching a glimpse of a disheveled looking Roman quickly grab the plate of pancakes before closing the door again.

"I'll be down later. Thanks again for the pancakes."

Patton made his way back to the commons. Sitting in the sofa that felt much too large for just him. He knew he was safe from any of the others seeing him, so he let himself cry. Tears were spilling down his cheeks. He wondered if there'd ever be anyone there to care for him. No. He was the caregiver. The Dad. It shouldn't be anyone else's responsibility to look after him. He would just have to manage. Stay positive around them. The positive emotions were the only emotions they needed from him anyway. They need a happy Patton to make them feel- to try to make them feel better then they're feeling down. Not a sad Patton. Not a Patton like this.

He rocked back and forth, crying heavily but silently. With silent sobs and unseen tears.

Eventually he stopped, exhausted. Now he just sat there, curled up in a ball. Staring at the wall and his knees. He zoned out, not having the energy to get up. He knew he should do something, get up and be productive, check on the others or- something. But through all of that, he just kept staring blankly at the wall. The pale cream wall. 

An hour or so passed at least, but he wasn't quite sure if he was aware of the time going by at all. 

Eventually he pulled himself to his feet, and made his way to the kitchen. He sighed at the mess he had left earlier, and got to work at the washing up and cleaning the surfaces.

He looked at the time after he had finished, and saw it was coming on for lunch time.

'If they're all struggling today then I'm sure they'd appreciate a nice lunch too.' he thought to himself. He imagined them all sitting around the table together, complimenting Patton on his soup and getting along.

Though deep down he knew that he probably wouldn't be joined for this meal either. 

The others tended to prefer isolation when they were feeling down, while all Patton seemed to desperately crave was the comfort of his friends. He couldn't bother them though, not when they were feeling down.

So he started making their soup and sandwiches, each with slightly different requirements that he knew off by heart. Roman preferred tomato soup, with the crusts of his sandwich cut off. Logan would rather just have a plain bread roll on the side, with minestrone soup. And Virgil liked straight cheese sandwich, and any soup would do. Patton had a feeling that Virgil did have a favourite, he had always seemed happiest after having chicken soup after all, but that he pretended not to mind to be easier on Patton. 

He got three pans out, and poured in a different tin of soup into each one, heating them up slowly and carefully.

It was only as he was taking the soups off of the hob and preparing to pour them into the three prepared dishes on the side, that he realised that he had forgotten to make himself anything. 

For lunch, and at breakfast. 

Well he could make himself something after giving the others theirs. They needed it most. 

He could wait.

He could always wait.

**Author's Note:**

> Thannk you very much for reading!  
my tumblr is @heck-im-lost
> 
> if you liked it please feel free to leave me a comment   
:)


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